I couldn't magically lose 30kg in a week but I could make some general exterior modifications to hair and make up which would make me more photogenic. Turns out I lost a few kilos at the hairdresser anyway when I decided to cut inches off my hair instead of the mere centimetres that I had intended to but that's a whole other post. I was at the hairdresser for four hours. My hair was shorter and so were the zero's on the end of the bill. Far. Out. Seriously. I will do another post.
After agonising for days over what to wear (ok it was about 5 minutes) I promptly got on Facebook and asked peeps what they thought I should wear. The responses were varied and if anything I just got even more confused! Black, white, bright colours, neutral, inside, outside... what the? I was leaning more towards outside as it's lovely and sunny here lately but that meant wearing slimming black was out. Not that there's anything wrong with black, it just wasn't the 'vibe' I wanted for an afternoon out in the sunshine photo shoot.
Staring blankly at my unsuitable wardrobe proved too much and I turned to my lovely boyfriend for some fashion critique. I don't know why I thought that would work because despite numerous fashion parades down the hallway in a number of different outfits, I couldn't get much more than a "Yeah, that's alright babe" or "That's nice I guess" out of the Juffin. Lovely. And no help whatsoever. He did however ask me "where's that dress that I like? You know the one" Um no, I don't. I didn't think you noticed any of my dresses enough to like one specifically. After pulling out all the dresses I own we found it.
(Side note, what is it with men and clothes?! The dialogue was ridiculous, it was all 'nah, not that one, you know the one, with the thing, and there's that colour here and it's sorta long but sorta short and it has that... whatever you look really pretty in it.' Really, that's it? That's all I have to work with?! It's comforting to know that I look really pretty in it. That one dress out of all the dresses I own, and there are a few, that I look pretty in this ONE dress. Anyway we found it, thanks to his awesome description and helpful direction. I think my tongue may become firmly lodged in my cheek forever.)
The dress is pretty bright and I'm not sure if it was right because
- It's not a white t-shirt. Nevermind that I'm a not a white t-shirt with jeans kind of gal, lots of people suggested white t-shirts, but white t-shirts and I just don't mix. I always end up spilling food on my chest and look even more rotund. Not that I'd be eating food right before having my photo taken to spill food on the white t-shirt but you know what I mean. I mean I don't even own a white t-shirt;
- It's very busy with a crazy pattern, lots of butterflies and swirls, and heaps of different colours. It may detract away from my blinding beauty and Mushroom's amazing cuteness;
- My boobs look huge in it. But my boobs look huge in everything these days so that's neither here nor there. To be honest I just needed a 3 so my 1 and 2 didn't look so stupid.
So I wore it, the bright patterned strapless dress that doesn't look too awful and I teamed it with a super sunny orange cardy and my boy wore an orange cloth nappy and a white singlet. Whilst we were a little matchy matchy I think we looked cute. The photographer said she loved our orange so fingers crossed it photographs well.
I've spent this whole post talking about how I couldn't decide what to wear and not about the shoot itself but I think it went pretty well! I made the Mushroom have a big sleep before hand so he wasn't cranky. I did this by driving around at sleep time until he fell asleep and then I went through the subway drive through, got some lunch and hung out in the car eating it at Mum's instead of trying to transfer him to the cot. I got to eat some lunch and Mushroom got a big sleep. It was a win win, extreme measures and all that. I needn't have worried that he wasn't going to behave anyway, he was a superstar. A real Zoolander in the making. He smiled, sat up by himself for whole minutes at a time, and looked right at the camera and hammed it up. What a cutie! It was a short mini shoot down by the river so all over in half an hour, which was perfect for a six month old and a woman who hates having her photo taken.
They should be done by Friday, fingers crossed that they turn out ok!