Just like my commitment to healthier living.
Why you so shit Jess?
We just finished school holidays here in Qld and Juffin took a few days off, so I didn't have to and Mushroom only had to spend one day at Vacation care. Brilliant. Molly went to daycare as usual as I worked my normal 3 days and Juffin spent some time with Mushroom on his own. Doesn't happen very often anymore the poor little one! He was thrilled to have his Dad all to himself. They watched Star Wars, played Minecraft, went to the movies, ate junk and didn't do any cleaning.
Of course, as fate would have it, both children took ill during last weekend and I had one vomiting all over the show and the other clinging to my legs whingeing constantly.
At least I got to work most of the day right?
Ugh. Hopefully she's ok tomorrow. The bigger one was fine. Pretty sure he just didn't want to go back to school but fingers crossed he settles in better this term than the last one!
I went to a birthday party with Mushroom over the weekend (BEFORE he got sick) and I got a lump in my throat watching him play by himself. He didn't really interact with the other kids. He took off on his own, or stood by and watched everyone else play. I don't know what's going on. His teacher said that he has heaps of friends but we've never been invited for a play at anyone's house, not that I've asked anyone over for a play either, but I don't know if that's a sign of him not really connecting with someone or me being a douche. On the last day of school, they had a fairytale day, and I watched as he sat by himself , he sat a few metres away from the group, and he ate his morning tea. I urged him to move but he was happy where he was and after Molly and I left, I cried. He didn't seem phased and always talks about playing with this person or that person but it just makes me sad to see him like that.
I'm sure I'm just being a dickhead. Parenting is killing me.
Being poor is also killing me, so we've had a bit of a chat about reversing our work roles, with me maybe working full time and Juffin picking up some part time work so he can focus on uni and the kids. It's been 5 years of me working part time now and I'm ready for a challenge, a change, I just don't want the Mummy guilt that will inevitably follow. Nothing's set in stone, but we know that we can't continue as we are as Juffin is working his guts out for peanuts and not getting any study done and we're barely making ends meet.
Has this arrangement worked for anyone else? Pros, cons? How do you deal with the guilt of missing out? I feel like I still miss out most of the time due to work and the inability to take a two year old along to school things or Molly missing out because on my days off I rush around like a mad thing trying to get shit done.