I cried like a baby. A very large baby who'd only been waiting for that damn proposal for about 20 years....
Obviously didn't know Juffin 20 years ago but I remember reading my favourite book when I was a kid and thinking I can't wait until I meet my beau, my love, my Gilbert Blythe. He was so dreamy, and perfect, and the whole thing was so romantic and desperate because she thought she didn't love him, but she obviously did, and finally realising that... ahhh, Anne of Green Gables. My favourite book of all time. Anyway, since reading Gilbert's proposal to Anne for the first time, all those years ago, I have been secretly waiting for my proposal.
I didn't have much luck in the love department. In high school I think the boys thought I was a bit weird. I'm also pretty loud and was chubby compared to my friends (I wish I was the same sort of chubby now!!) but for whatever reason, it just didn't really happen. There were plenty of boys that I had a crush on, but no-one seemed to crush right back at me. Hilariously, I went out with Juffin on a date in high school. Yes, we went to high school together. Ridiculous. I think I was 16. I do know that we went to see the Ghost and the Darkness which should have been the perfect date movie but I just felt annoyed that he'd bought maltesers (I don't like maltesers) and my hand got so sweaty cos he kept holding it. The movie wasn't that scary. We walked home and chatted afterwards but I think I got a little freaked out by how intense he was. It felt like he was looking into my soul with his blue, blue eyes. We kissed and then I went home thinking I'm so not ready for a boyfriend. That was my one and only high school date. To the man that I am now going to marry. Is that the definition of ironic or is that something else?
University was a little different, however, I got my heart broken early on and that ruined me for years. I'm not exaggerating. He ripped my heart out. I was devastated. For a few short months, I realised that I wasn't that fat, or weird, I just hadn't met the right boy yet. And then he left. And that was it. So began years of club hopping, bed hopping and lots of blurry faceless boys. I'm not ashamed. I regret nothing. I had the time of my life but somewhere, deep down inside, being drowned by litres of vodka and bourbon, was my little dream. The dream of finding my other half, the one. Despite having my heartbroken, I still just wanted someone to love me as much as Gilbert loved Anne. Or, more realistically, the love between my beautiful parents. To find someone to love who loved me back, just like my parents, that was my little dream. This year my parents celebrated 35 years of marriage. 35 years. That's a big deal these days.
At 27, after seeing the same boy for years and it going nowhere, I said for the billionth time that I was not going to call him again. I was out, again, and this time I was definitely thinking that I would stick to my guns. I'd gone out for a work thing and was hanging around outside this bar and I remember seeing him and thinking, 'Shit, that's Juffin!' Now sometimes when you see people from high school, they pretend they don't know you and walk on by, or they just don't see you. So I was standing there thinking is he going to say hello? Will I say hello if he doesn't say hello? He's pretty cute. And tall. And cute. Oh god, he's looking at me, he recognises me, he's smiling, HOORAY!
10 years of living in the same town and we'd run into each other once before that night. Destiny?
I remember him putting my number in his phone and believing absolutely that I wouldn't hear from him.
We've been together for 6 years next week.
After harping on about for about 5 years and 11 months, it finally happened. We got engaged. We went out to an Italian restaurant for dinner. Juffin seemed pretty nervous, and was wearing his best shirt, so I knew something was up. He also told me to wear a dress.... like he ever cares what I wear! All throughout dinner he kept asking me if I was enjoying the meal, that I looked beautiful, telling me that he loved me... it was not normal behaviour. At that point I thought, far out, it's finally going to happen! O. M. G!! I was so nervous about it I almost dropped the aracini ball on my lap.
About halfway through our dinner and it started raining, really hard, and Juffin did not look happy about it. He was searching the sky, staring moodily at the clouds, it was odd. It hadn't rained for months and he generally gets pretty excited about it. I knew in that moment that he was maybe going to do it, but the rain had put a spanner in his works so maybe he wouldn't do it after all. I tried not to think about it and instead, stuffed delicious boscaiola into my mouth. Even if he didn't do it, the food was amazing and I wasn't wasting this night out! More wine waiter please!
By some fluke, we managed to score a free nutella dessert pizza but after all that Italiano goodness, I was seriously struggling to move. The rain had well and truly set in and we were alone, dining al fresco, people watching and laughing. It was lovely. We finished what we could of our dessert and Juffin got up to pay the bill, still no ring, so I thought, oh well, it’s definitely not happening, totally misread that situation, geez!
Another five minutes went by, we ate a lot of Italian food, and I said enough's enough, go and get the bloody car so I don’t get wet walking over there. He just laughed and said, yeah yeah yeah, fobbing me off. Just then the tent we were sitting under started buckling under the weight of built up rainwater and I shrieked, I gotta get out of here and I jumped up out of my seat, thinking that a mountain of water was about to bucket down on my head.
As I was jumping up Juffin grabbed my hands and said 'Wait' and went to kneel down but it was wet so he was sort of hovering above the ground and not quite kneeling and he looked up at me with those big blue eyes and I just lost it. I started crying. Juffin said "I love you so much. I can't imagine being with anyone else but you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you" and I was just standing there blubbering everywhere but laughing as well. :"You're everything to me, will you marry me?" he said, then gave me a little black box. I could barely see I was crying so much but when I opened it and saw the beautiful ring, I couldn't believe it. Over and over again I kept saying 'oh my god, oh my god, it's so beautiful' tears streaming down my face.
Juffin stood and kissed me and said "Does that mean you said yes?"
We were both laughing and I said "Yes, of course yes!" Then he put that beautiful, shiny, unique ring on my finger and I just about exploded with happiness.
No big display, no rose petals, no declarations of love shouted from mountaintops, no champagne. Just Juffin and his beautiful, heartfelt, nervous words of love.
I will never forget it.
|My Engagement Ring - Alexandrite with two diamonds|
|My face says it all really!|