11 Nov 2012

Thank you, thank you, thank you! And what happens when you get cocky!

This post is for you.  The reader.  You guys have shown such support, such encouragement, such wisdom, that I'm literally blown away.  When people talk about how there's no goodness left in the World, I will forever be reminded of the advice, the words of encouragement, the offers of help by you lovely ladies.  Some of you I haven't seen or spoken to directly in years, but you have reached out and offered me assistance.  This means so much to me.

I had hoped that by starting this blog, I would be able to share my ups and downs with friends and family.  I had no idea that so many of you would be interested in reading, or sharing your own experiences, which so many of you have done.  It makes what I'm going through seem less of 'hurdle' and more of a 'hiccup'.  Cementing the fact that you truly are never alone.

I would like to advise that the previous post was in reference to a night we experienced 2 weeks ago.  My blog is a little behind as I was trying to catch up on all that has happened since his birth.  We've had two wonderful weeks since.  Not even lying.  Mushroom got into a distinct routine, hell knows how we managed that, and our day went something like this:

Awake at 5.45am.  Feeding, bonding time with Mummy and Daddy, cuddles, watching Mummy and Daddy have breakfast, kissing Daddy good bye as he goes to work, more feeding.  Asleep again by 8am.  In the last few days we have then gone for a walk but initially the following would happen: Jess sits around and wonders what to do.  Does laundry despite being told not to by nurses, doctors and the Juffin. Facebook, shower, watch some tv, read the news online, stare at son and take stupid photo's of sleeping child, blog.  Decide what to have for lunch, take out meat for dinner....  Mushroom awakes around midday. Nappy change, feeding, cuddles, more feeding.  He falls asleep.  Back in the hammock by 1, 1.30pm and Jess is alone again....  Juffin comes home for lunch.  Yay!  Adult conversation!  He's only here for a half hour or so.  Get in trouble for doing washing.  He gazes at son adoringly, Jess' heart melts.  Off he goes back to work.  I then hang out/bring in washing, play games on my phone until it dies, take more photo's of son, more facebook....  decide to have a nap.  We both wake around 4.30 5pm.  This is the alert period of the day.  You know, the time when you actually need to get stuff done, like cook dinner, show your other half that you appreciate him, talk to your friends who have been at work all day!  Mushroom will stay up for approximately 4 hours.  We feed constantly, cuddle, have bathtime/shower time with Dad, sing songs and change about 4 nappies.  Back to bed by 8-9pm and then he's out to about 1.30am when he wakes up for night feed.  Which lasts about half hour and then he promptly goes back to sleep and we start it all over again at quarter to 6 the next morning.

I know. It's awesome.  Feeding going famously well.  Mum and Dad getting sleep, we're able to eat food, shower, you know, all that stuff that makes you feel like a human being.  And I was so fucking pleased with us, like we did something right and we had this fantastically advanced newborn who was adhering to a dream schedule and we were totally not going to have that horror new baby experience that so many people have had.  What a douche.

On Friday just gone, the Mushroom basically said 'fuck you Mum, I do what I want' and threw that routine out the window.  I honestly thought I was home free.  Idiot.  I mean he's only 3 weeks old.  What the hell was I thinking?!  We have just had a crazy 2.5  days of constant feeding, very little sleep, crying, crying crying, and some pretty nasty looking nappy rash.  And we're doing cloth nappies.  I thought I'd heard all varieties of crying but not like this... wowsers!  I feel that we've sufficiently paid back our neighbours for their constant dog barking that kept me awake when I was pregnant.  I've now been in the same nightie since Friday night.  I honestly couldn't see the sense in getting changed as it's a breast feeding nightie and my boobs have been out for two days anyway so what's the point?

This morning, at around 5am, I finally got him to go down and stay down for longer than 20 minutes without crying.  The poor little bastard looks so tired.  I feel so bad for him and then I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and feel bad for both of us.  I'm hoping that this is just a 3 week old growth spurt, as the intermenet keeps telling me, as I'm not sure that my boobs (or my sanity) can take much more of this.  Fingers crossed that it's all over now and I can get the fuck out of this nightie. It stinks and has breast milk stains all over it.  In fact, I'm off to take a shower whilst I can!

Success!  Sleeping like Superman!  

Next time: Our first outing in a nutshell and hopefully sanity has returned...